Written 9.8.14

I had a grandiose plan not only to methodically document all of Bennett’s amazing firsts but also any life changing revelations I might have as a new parent. First major lesson as a parent – best laid intentions have a 50/50 chance of going the way you thought they would…maybe slightly less than that the first few years…and that is OK. For now, I will just make sure I take the time to share a thought when I can and maybe, if my memory holds, I can slip in some things that have already passed that are worth noting.

He and I spent the evening together because Dad had a Vestry meeting at church. He noticed Dad wasn’t around but he didn’t try to push the envelop tonight, we just hung out and watched YouTube videos of Elmo singing with celebrities. He is particularly fond of Elvis Costello these days and I am good with that. Some days it is Katy Perry or Destiny’s Child…those are hard for me to take, especially repetitively.

In the last couple of weeks he has shown signs of wanting to be more like us – to be more grown up. He has told us multiple times he wants to drink “coffees”. He has expressed interest in using the toilet although we have yet to officially make a deposit. And tonight he asked to drink water from my glass. I was hesitant to let him do it fearing a puddle on the floor, him choking, or refusal to drink from the sippy going forward. He handled it without trouble, as long as I held on to the glass. I’m sure this is just the beginning of that curiosity/desire to be a big kid.

On the way home from work today, I saw a little girl learning how to ride a bike without training wheels in the church parking lot with her parents. Her dad was doing his best to run and hang on to the back of the seat while she slowly engaged the pedals and took off. For the first time I thought of how daunting that feeling must be for the parent holding the seat. You could be the only thing keeping balance and preventing your child from eating pavement if it that balance should falter. Your child is making a leap of faith to continue pedaling in hopes of lifting off into biking nirvana…you as a parent are praying to god, when you let go you won’t have to peel them off the pavement…and the secondary cool but scary thing is it’s just the start of them becoming independent.